sorry i havent written for so long. its been a while hasnt it beloved blog. i've been neglecting you. recently ive thought alot about what my cousin said about choosing my major. im so confused.
im torn between writing, languages,teaching,and business. i keep thinking i should do what other people want me to do. im mean they know me the best. i myself dont know what to do.
do i really have potential talent in writing? i keep a blog but that doesnt mean i can write. especially to make a career out of it. jen says that if i work at it i can make something out of it. but i dont write all the time. im too lazy, i have all these ideas but im too lazy to put it on paper.
i love languages, its my one true motavation in life. its to learn new languages. i love learning new languages. omg i want to learn soo many so badly and improve. i know its hardwork but if i put in enough hardwork im sure i can master it. noone believes i can do it. is it that hard to see me speaking korean,japanese,taiwanese,and awesome chinese. really its hard but i believe i can do it. ive never wanted something so badly. to speak different languages fluently will put me in a different position than others. why cant people see it like that?
i love kids, i really do. but its so safe and boring. i will only stay in one place all the time and be forever stuck with my mom! >.< if i choose to become a teacher i see myself 10 years from now dealing with middle school kids with bratty and annoying personalities. I'm still going to be living with my mom and giving her $2000 each month while trying to pay off my college tuition. i will actually go kill myself. i would go insane.
should i become a business woman? should i go into business because my dad wanted me to. he doesn't know me well anymore. why should he care about what i want. i really cant see myself being stuck in a small office cubicle working from 9 to 5 Monday to Friday.
a couple days ago i was with my dad taking care of some IRS business. his cellphone rang and all of a sudden he was talking in this gentle voice. he said hes eaten and ask the person on the phone if he/she eaten. i haven't seen him talking in a gentle voice in 3 years. when he talked to my mom he used to yell and talk in this harsh tone. i hated every single moment. but i kept my anger in and put on a happy voice. if they get married I'm protesting and not going to the wedding. shes only marrying him because shes a f-ing immigrant and she cant get a greencard. f-ing bitch i really hope she rots in hell.
i went camping with joey 4th of July weekend. it was so much fun. <3 shes so cool to talk with. really fun.
we got to the camping site at 3pm. there was platforms where we could pitch the tent up in a flat surface. it was the first time i pitched up a tent it was really fun. it looks hard but it really isnt. then it was bbq. joeys parents came really prepared. there were i think 6 other families. so they all brought food. i think we had food to last 18 people about 1 week. there was ALOT of food. omg ive never seen so much meat. it was around 9pm that both joey and i needed to go to the bathroom. before she warned me that the bathrooms and shower stalls were DISGUSTING. bugs on stalls, unimaginable smells,crap on the walls. the bathrooms and showerstalls were really DISGUSTING. there were crap on walls bugs on the stalls. they were so bad that both me and jolie didnt take a shower while we were there. UGGGH when we came back joey suggested that i try quail. OMG its the best thing ive ever tried. it was SOOO GOOOD. i ate like 4 pieces. it started raining around quarter to 12. raining really really hard. >.< stupid. i hate the rain and we were going to wait till the rain had stopped to go to the bathroom before we went to sleep, it was almost 3 and the rain STILL hadn't stopped. stupid. finally Henry brought us to the bathroom and at the campsite. IT WAS DARK. like no light whatsoever. omg not even a firefly. so dark.
me and joey talked until 3 and then Henry complained that we were too loud and told us to sleep. =P
me and joey slept until 11. hahah on sat i took like two naps and went fishing and walked on the beach. at night i was waiting for quail and some chicken? anyways i asked joey's dad if i could try some of his beer. he let me try. i more like gulped down a mouthful. ^^ it tasted awful. i coughed afterward. joey gave me Pepsi afterwards to get rid of the taste. then Henry said corona tasted milder. so i asked joeys father if i could try corona. yea...i took a taste....more like 3 mouthfuls. drank like half a plastic cup. it did taste milder but i still tasted the beer. afterwards we played the have you. omg I've never cussed so much ever. apparently i have a very foul mouth when I'm drinking. hahah people have drank underage before. i wasn't driving or doing anything. i could still see and think afterwards. but i was very tired so then i brushed my teeth (didn't want the beer taste in my mouth)and slept.
thankfully i didn't wake up with a hangover. =D i felt fine the next day.
1 comment:
Wow, I was just wondering if you had updated. You should post every week if you can; I miss reading your posts!
Honestly, I can't see you being a writer. You need to learn better grammar and organization before you can pursue that as a career.
Business, that's boring. I won't become a businesswoman. I don't think you should, either. I can't see you in that kind of position. And yeah, office work isn't fun.
Whoa, the showers were that gross? I don't know what campsite you went to, but the one Jolie and I used in July 2004 was definitely not that gross. D:
I wish I had been there to see you drunk. O_o Haha.
I'll see you tomorrow! We're having a meeting around 2PM. :D
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